Monochrome
by Scribbler
Summary: Sam used to wonder what good things each day would bring. Then puberty hit and she just wondered what each day would bring. Today brought something she couldn't have predicted. Who's this boy in the green leotard saying he loves her? Naruto Crossover.


**Disclaimer: **Not mine, never were.

**A/N: **Written for Croix Souillees as part of the Boiz and Gurlz ficlet-request meme on LiveJournal. She requested a Naruto/Danny Phantom crossover featuring Rock Lee, Sam and the prompt 'monochrome'. Please do _NOT_ tell me this is not long enough or not a real fic. It is a _ONE SHOT_ and intended to be only a snippet of a possible situation that might occur if these two universes interacted.

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_**Monochrome**_

© Scribbler, December 2007.

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'_And sometimes I worry and fear what tomorrow may bring.'_ – From _Monochrome_ by Lush.

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When she was a little girl, Sam used to wake up and wonder what good things the new day would bring. Then she hit puberty and just wondered what the day would bring. Then her best friend stepped into his parents' Ghost Portal and accidentally switched it on, and she starting worrying what life-threatening problems each new day would bring.

This one wasn't life-threatening, and it was definitely not something she could've predicted when she opened her eyes that morning.

"I do not understand. You are in the spring of youth. You are beautiful. Why do you not celebrate it?"

For what felt like the millionth time since the Ghost Zone vomited her out of her world and into this one, Sam resisted the urge to scream. "Because," she gritted, "underneath any glitter life is dark and dank and – you think I'm beautiful?"

The kid with the big eyebrows nodded vigorously. "Of course. Your beauty is like a summer's dawn, like the sparkling waters of a babbling brook, like the effortless splendour of a snow-capped mountain! I shall run thirty laps around the village as proof of your loveliness!" He leapt to his feet and took off so fast Sam was still staring at his chair when he was halfway down the street.

"O… kay."

"Don't worry." As if on cue, a girl walked in wearing the most hideous pink shirt Sam had ever seen – and she went to school with Paullina. This was evidently the newest guard against her making a break for it to poison the water supply. Or something. "He does that a lot."

"He does?" Sam peered through the swinging door. He was doing a fine clip and already at the treeline. He passed beyond and out of her view and the other girl shut the door.

"You get used to it after a while." The other girl shrugged and sat in the vacated chair. "Did he get around to introducing himself this time?"

"Uh, no, actually, he was too busy questioning my fashion sense and mental state."

The girl laughed. "Well just in case he doesn't manage when he gets back, his name is Rock Lee. I'm Tenten." She stuck out her free hand and San shook it. The girl's palm was calloused, her grip stronger than Sam had ever felt before from someone her own age, especially such a deceptively skinny one. Valerie had a strong grip, but even Valerie's handshake didn't daunt as much as this one.

"Sam. Sam Manson."

One thing she'd learned fast about this world? People were stronger and tougher than she was used to but looked like waifs from a magazine. She'd only seen one fat lady and apparently that was some family tradition thing that celebrated being morbidly obese because it made you a fantastic warrior. Great Aunt Ethel would love it here.

Another girl walked in, the blonde one Sam landed on when she popped into this universe.

Okay, as long as the magazine was Kinky Sex Siren Monthly.

"So have we figured out what village she's from yet?" the blonde girl demanded. She was sporting a huge bruise on her head and a thunderous expression on her face.

Sam speculated that it didn't matter what universe she was in, Goths and blonde plastics did _not_ get along, even if the fishnet divide had been breached.

"Actually," said Tenten, "we've figured out that she's not from one of the hidden villages. She's not a ninja and, more importantly, she's not from our world."

"Excuse me?"

"I don't really understand it either," Sam admitted. "I was in a place called the Ghost Zone and got pushed through a doorway I'd never seen before. Next thing I know I'm landing on something that's screaming insults at me. Nice potty mouth, by the way."

The girl shot her a withering look. "Does she have a name?"

"Sam Manson," Tenten replied, "though you could always ask her yourself."

"I walk, talk and go potty, all for thirteen dollars and ninety-nine cents." Sam looked at both girls' blank expressions. "That would've gotten a laugh in my world."

The blonde girl snorted. "Whatever. I just came to say the Fifth is on her way over to check out the prisoner."

"Prisoner?" Sam sat bolt upright. "I'm a _prisoner_?"

"No." Tenten generated a glare that could send iron filings scurrying for cover in a plastic dish. "You're an honoured guest."

"As long as you don't harbour any harm you want to visit upon Konoha."

"Konoha … that's the name of this village, right? Nope, no harm harboured here. Just a really intense desire to go home." And to see whether Danny and Tucker were okay. Sam hadn't been the only one knocked for a loop when Skulker's latest technology exploded under Danny's barrage and their vehicle self-detonated. The memory of Danny's hand, inches from her own as the inexorable pull of the portal yanked her down, burned a hole in the back of her head.

"Now there's something we can agree on," the blonde girl sniped.

The door burst open, slammed against the wall, ricocheted back and hit the person who'd shoved it. He fell backwards onto his butt, kicked out automatically with both feet and broke the entire thing in two. Sam gaped as Rock Lee bounced to his feet, tousled but not even sweating.

"Ah, joyousness of the highest order! I leave one beautiful lady and return, victorious, to three beautiful ladies! Truly, Konoha is filled to overflowing with the beauty of youth!"

"You've done thirty laps already?" Sam boggled.

"Only thirty?" Tenten shook her head and began unwrapping her package, which turned out to be small pots of rice and sushi. "You're slipping, Lee. There was a time Sakura just glancing your way would have you running around the village a hundred times on your hands."

"You're right!" Lee struck a pose of such dramatic sorrow that Sam half expected a chorus of violins to crescendo into life. "I have committed a grievous offence against your honour, fair ... uh … fair …"

"Sam," Tenten provided, passing Sam a rice ball wrapped in seaweed. She tried to also give her a pot of sashimi, but Sam declined by raising her palm. "Sam Manson."

"Sam Manson." Lee's eyes became watery with unconcealed delight. "Such unparalleled beauty deserves such a handsome name. I shall sing it from the rooftops so that other may know of your presence in our fair village!"

Manson wasn't a name that earned much respect in her world, and usually that didn't bother Sam. Why would she want to be always associated with the same surname her parents adored so much? Still, it was nice for someone to call it 'handsome' instead of 'icky' or 'isn't that the same name as the guy who started a cult and murdered all those people?'

The blonde girl socked Lee in the chops. "Can it, idiot. She's not staying."

"Not staying?" Lee looked horrified, but not phased by her punch. The people here really did seem damn near indestructible. Maybe, Sam thought, she should find out their secret and take it back with her if Danny insisted on facing ever-more dangerous enemies. "But why?"

"Because she wants to get back to her own world and her own clan, doofus."

Clan? Oh no, no, no – Mom and Dad were parental units, not family in the truest sense. If you took family to mean a close-knit group who cared for each other and took an actual interest in each other's lives then Jack and Maddie Fenton were more her parents than the Mansons. Although they had their faults on that front, too, since they'd managed to miss every sign of their son's extra-curricular activities, up to and including being told he was fighting ghosts using his own special powers in his spare time.

"But our lives are a tedious monochrome without her matchless beauty to bring the light!" Lee continued mournfully.

Monochrome? Sam looked at their costumes – vivid green, sugar pink, delicate mauve – compared to her all-black outfit. "Uh…"

"I shall run five hundred laps of the village to prove my devotion and make you stay, fair Sam Manson." Lee whirled on his heel like a drill. "I shall – oof!" He ran straight into the mammoth bosom of the woman behind him.

For a moment the world seemed frozen, as if waiting to see what would happen next. The woman looked down at Lee's face pressed between her breasts, rolled her eyes and casually peeled him out. Lifting him as if he weighed nothing more than a sack of flour, she threw him across the room to where Tenten stuck out an arm without looking and caught him before he could hit the wall. She plonked him in the chair next to hers and shoved a rice ball into his mouth like a pacifier.

"I see we're all making ourselves very comfortable," said the woman. She had a deep voice and serious brown eyes. Her gaze came to rest on Sam, who smiled and gave a tiny wave of greeting that quickly became a scratch behind the ear. The woman arched an eyebrow and Sam actually quailed a little. This newcomer radiated power like a plutonium rod – which made it extra jarring when she threw back her head with a raucous laugh. "You can't be comfortable without saké! Except for you girls, you're underage. And _especially_ for you, Lee." She jabbed a finger at him. "You're dangerous."

"Yes, Hokage." Lee chewed and swallowed his mouthful of rice while enthusiastically bobbing his head.

"Sake and onigiri, then we'll talk, make plans and beat the hell out of whomever and whatever needs it. Am I right?"

"Yes Hokage," chorused Lee, Tenten and the blonde girl.

Sam looked between them. Then she looked up at the woman they addressed as 'Hokage', apparently the leader of this entire ninja (freaking _ninja_) village. The woman winked at her with one of her serious brown eyes and produced a bottle from her cleavage.

This world was as full of crazies as her own.

Oh well, at least this would make a great story when she finally got home.

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_**Fin.**_

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End file.
